The other day, a friend of mine observed about me, that I’m not as outdoorsy of a person as I thought I was. Initially, I took slight offense to this. I grew up a country boy. As a kid, when my father was alive, I spent most of my time with him in fields and pastures. Feeding and taking care of livestock. Plowing and planting crops. As a matter of fact I would beg my father to go with him rather than go to school. School was boring. It was no fun! At five or six years old, my dad taught me how to drive on a tractor. By the time my father’s cancer had progressed to the point he was too weak to drive at times, I would be his chauffeur. I was a responsible, proficient driver of the back roads of Hempstead, Texas by the time my father died. Mind you, I was only nine years old when he died.
My father, before he passed, bought me a garden tractor/ riding lawn mower because I wanted to be like him and plow and plant my own field, i.e. garden. I loved the outdoorsy life as a kid.
After my father passed, and my mom moved to Jasper, the outdoors fun changed from tractors and livestock to bikes and neighborhood friends. I was a typical 80’s kid. We spent our days OUTSIDE! Riding bikes, playing games in the streets like baseball, football, having rock and dirt clod fights, bottle rocket and roman candle wars. Playing hide and go seek. Drinking from a water hose. Running/racing home before the street lights came on. Outdoors was where it was at!
Once I got to middle school and high school, outside included football, running and training for football. The bike riding decreased. Playing in the neighborhood decreased. Football and training for football preoccupied my time. But I was OUTSIDE!
I was no stranger to being outdoors. I loved being outdoors. So that’s why whenever this friend said this, I slightly took offense. However, as I thought about it, that outdoors time was all when I was younger. So as I thought about it more, I realized that friend, from what they have known of me, has only seen the mainly indoor living me.
What happened? What had I become? So instead of being defensive, I needed to think about why I had become such a home body? Where had the “adventure” side of me gone?
New Adventure (Life) – The Sandwich Generation
What I came to realize is that a significant part of my adult life required attention to a new endeavor. That was raising my own family. As Kandi and I began to grow our own family, we were also ladled with the responsibility of what has been termed the “sandwich generation”.
The sandwich generation is a term given to couples who are busy taking care of young kids – parenting, all while caring for aging parents. This was us during the first half of our marriage. My mom had major health issues and almost two and a half years after Kandi and I were married, she passed away.
Kandi’s parents were next in line. And they both had a myriad of health issues. Both physical as well as mental health problems. This along with parenting our own two kids, plus our “bonus child” Erie, who was perfecting her own version of being the most notorious rebellious teenager there ever was, kept Kandi and I busy and financially strained for a long time.
During all of this, my only outlet – and outdoor activity – was coaching little league football. Football consumed me. I loved being on the field, coaching and mentoring kids. It was (and is) one of my three loves. You know, “Faith, Family and Football”. And the order is subject to change depending on circumstances.
“A Brave New World”
Well, the kids have been raised. The parents are all gone. It is no longer “We”. It is just “Me”. Even prior to this unplanned (and unwanted) status change, “We”, Kandi and I, were plotting and planning our new life direction. This did include some form of being outdoors. In some ways, I always had in mind a return to my “roots” of enjoying being outdoors. And of doing something where I got really dirty and grimy like I used to as a kid.
There was the one time recently when I had to take a detour through the woods and actually got the opportunity to put my truck in 4×4 mode. Now that was fun! I felt a slight rush. I even had a slight sense of nostalgia. I so wanted to turn around and go back through those woods again!
But I digress . . .
In this season of my life
I’m still trying to learn who I am. What are my likes and dislikes as a single man? What interests do I have and what do I want to do? Being involved with football in some way is still a thing. Whether as a spectator, official or coach, I’m still about that life. No matter how hard I try to retire from coaching, I just can’t let it go.
As far as other aspects of my outdoors life will go, we will see.
As the old saying goes, “I don’t know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future.” So, I hope that in my future I’m holding some dirt.